― 161 ―

Der Pritish Tar From Amsterdam

If you listen to mine shtory vat I tell,
I vas told you all apout it vhen I'm done.
It's apout a man vhat I knows pooty vell,
Pecause he vas mine fader's only son.
Mine fader cut me out to be a tailor,
Put he took a lion to cut out a lamb;
So I yoined a Pritish ship to pe a sailor
Und a Pritish tar vhat hailed from Amsterdam.

Ve hoisted oop der masts upon der sails,
Und sailed across der ocean und der sea;
Ve sailed from Liverpool to New Soud Vales,
Und dhat vas shoost der place vhat suited me.
I learned me how to polish oop der anchor,
Und how to tie a knot vhat didn't yamb,

  ― 162 ―
To box der pig yib-boom und shplice der shpanker
Like a Pritish tar vhat coomed from Amsterdam.

I learned to sing “Pritannia Rules der Vaves,”
Der leetle mermaids coomed to hear me sing;
I shouted “Pritons neffer shan't be shlafes,
Und after dat “Cot Pless oor Cracious King.”
I safed me oop a pocket full of money,
A Vhite Australian Pritisher I am;
I learned to say “Vhat cheer?” und “Oh! my honey,”
I'm a Pritish tar, vhat coomed from Amsterdam.

I vas followed soon py Yanson, Hans, and Fritz,
Und men from Scandinavia, until
You might hunt all your Pritish ships to bits,
Und you couldn't neffer find a Tom or Pill.
Dere vas no vons from der Clyde or Tipperary,
Dere vas neffer any Pat or Yack or Sam;
Und Dick, und Yoe, und Sandy, Mick, und Harry,
Dey vas hunted py der man from Amsterdam.

  ― 163 ―
Den shplice der prace, und throw der main deck ofer,
Und oop der puckets fill, mit lager peer,
Ve'll sail der seas from Shmoky Cape to Dover,
Und ve'll pust oorselfes der Union Yack to cheer.
Put if der clouds of war should effer threaten,
For Priton's foes ve didn't gif a dam,
Ve'll neffer shtop to see oorselfs get peaten,
For ve'll luff her oop und off for Amsterdam.